One

one
I just need one
Just one breathing
Living entity
To understand me
That’s all I’ve ever wanted
I just want
Someone to listen
And someone to tell me
Their deepest darkest
Thoughts regrets
Things I haven’t heard yet
And things I have heard
I just want them to become open
With me
And only me
I want to be that special person
For someone to talk to
For someone to listen to me
For someone to hold onto what I’m saying
And not let go.
I don’t want the superficial
I don’t want the surface talk
I don’t want the jokes
I don’t want anything else
All I’ve ever wanted
Was one true human
To be another true human alongside me
All I’ve ever wanted was a true friend
I’m not perfect
And I wouldn’t expect them to be either
I don’t want perfection.
I want the most imperfect person
To want to be imperfect with me
I don’t know why
I can’t grasp that
I think there must be something wrong with me
Maybe someday
I’ll see the light
And find what I desire
in a friendship
Or maybe someday
I just won’t exist
And at this junction
At this terrifying place
In my life
Either is just fine with me
Not existing is just fine with me.